PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
