talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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