Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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