i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
