it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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