Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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