don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
i out mim tonsoeep
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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