If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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