u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
