4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
