Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
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