I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
