Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
