You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
