I think im going to throw up on grandma
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
