He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
