He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
