I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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