He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
