The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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