my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
