okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I just blew my weed a kiss
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
