cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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