He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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