Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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