your room smells of hookers.
And success
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Randomize
