I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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