you didnt know i had herpes?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
