I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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