Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
