I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
