I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
