Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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