Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
