You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
