i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
