I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Randomize
