yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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