"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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