office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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