sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
