my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
