is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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