He is an equal opportunity slut.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
