She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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