Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
