Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
