it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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