So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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