Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
