Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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