My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
